“It's a funny thing about comin' home. Looks the same, smells the same, feels the same. You'll realize what's changed is you.” ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald
I hadn't really intended to return here today, though I must admit I had thought about it, recently. How I will return is yet to be seen. What I know is I'm here. I kind of stumbled into it, while doing some online "housekeeping". And so...here I am.
Have I changed? We are always changing.
There will be no more "daily writing exercises" here - my writing doesn't work that way. I write when I write, and when I do write daily, it is not an exercise.
Given the continuing (and increasingly) unsettled state of the world, we don't always need to respond to it immediately, as if on demand. That's what went wrong with this blog. I started to feel like I was setting up an expectation to "write on demand", on the world's schedule, not mine, and worse yet, in alignment with whatever the "expectation of the day" happened to be. That sort of an "exercise" does not lend itself either to authenticity or free exploration - or for that matter, to deep and honest reflection. You will not find me echoing here "the thought of the day", whatever that happens to be, like an artificial flock of parrots. (Do uncaged parrots flock? I really couldn't tell you.)
The blog looks the same. It's a kind of a home. The quote I chose for today isn't necessarily one I entirely agree with. Usually "home", when you've been absent, does indeed change. Some things may feel the same, but many things will be different. And if we are noticing, we will find we too are changing. That part of the quote is much more true. And when we are changing, we may actually notice even "old things" in new ways - in fact, that is what we can expect, if we are noticing.
It feels good to return. I may even be back tomorrow.
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